Freezing and dark in balmy Chennai

I was woken on Tuesday morning by a call from a colleague in Sydney. The Australian tour of South Africa was about to be officially called off. Such was the dread of the news, I had to ask whether he was sure. “I’m afraid so, mate.”

For weeks there was cynicism about the Australian players’ desire to come to South Africa. Vice-captain Pat Cummins expressed significant reservations about visiting the Republic over a month ago. But ultimately, we are told, the decision was taken out of Cricket Australia’s hands. Medical advice from further up the governmental food-chain put paid to their visit.

It is pointless to cite the successful, ongoing Pakistan Women’s tour, or the success of the Irene Country Club bio-secure ‘bubble’ which was used during the Sri Lanka tour and would have been used again for the three Tests against Australia. Everybody’s efforts will be better spent focussing on what can be done now rather than what can’t be.

Today was day-11 of my 10-day isolation period in London. There was an ‘errant’, extra day on my booking – one for luck, so I stayed. Mostly because I may have developed mild ‘Stockholm Syndrome’ towards my apartment. One morning I heard someone talking to the fridge. Then I realised it was me. “What have you got for me today, fridgey…?”

Whereas the painfully slow WiFi once rattled me, I found myself encouraging it in the way a doting parent might cheer on an asthmatic child during the school cross-country. I applauded its efforts to download a small file rather than scowled. The television is supposed to operate using the WiFi, which is a laudably optimistic set-up.

The classic English shower was a source of frustration for a few days but the time it took to get my whole body wet under the gentle mist of warm water was soon more intriguing than irritating. About three-and-a-half minutes, with regular rotation.

The welcome brochure promised a weekly ‘service’, on Wednesday. I had made plans to stand outside on the fire-escape stairwell to avoid close proximity to the house-keeping staff. It was a plan which never came to fruition.

When I answered the knock on the door, mask on, there was a navy blue laundry bag outside with a masked lady three metres behind it. She took an extra step backwards when I appeared.

“There’s clean sheets and towels, please strip the bed and put the used linen in the bag. There’s a vacuum and cleaning stuff in the cupboard. I’ll be back in five minutes, please keep the door closed. Thank you.”

London Bridge is less than 500 metres away but it cannot be seen from the apartment. On the 10th morning I was finally able to go for a long run on the Thames path in the early morning cold and dark. It was not just refreshing but exhilarating.

Borough Market is also just a few hundred metres away, a famous shopping spot for healthy eating options and fresh fruit and veg. Many of the shops and stalls are closed and those which are open are clearly struggling to survive on meagre returns.

The end of self-isolation does not necessarily mean the end of ready-made meals for one with almost six weeks still to go, although I’ve had enough lasagne for the immediate future. The ‘ready-made’ food industry has come a very long way since I was last a regular consumer.

Commentary on England’s Test series in India for talkSPORT will be unlike most assignments I have done in the last 30 years. I have commentated off the television before, and I have worked through the night before. But not during a pandemic. Or when it’s freezing outside.

The alarm will be set for 2:45am for the first two Tests in Chennai before it changes to 7:30am for third, day-night Test in Ahmedabad. The seven-man commentary team will each have their own desk and microphone throughout the series, separated by at least two metres and perspex screens.

We will eat separately and have hot drinks delivered to us by a ‘runner’. We are required to conduct Covid ‘flow’ tests on ourselves on a regular basis and, obviously, maintain social-distancing at all times. As excited as I am about the prospect of the series, it would be dishonest to claim that I am not a little intimidated by the circumstances of the job – for which I am sincerely grateful.

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